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2020, new steelbeasts version features

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1 hour ago, Apocalypse 31 said:

As someone who constantly manages projects....yep. I think the joke was widely missed.  


Hedgehogs image depicts (as a joke) how most project management planning timelines first appear versus how most projects get completed....for those with no f**king humor around here.

I really enjoy the snarkiness, toxic masculinity and Type A behaviour that prevail here because I don't get them in my highly feminised and PC working environments. I love the humour too :)

PS: If, as I suspect, the Australian taxpayer footed the bill for SMArt to be added to SB, then many thanks to gibsonm and the ADF presence here for the upgrade! 

Edited by ChrisWerb

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On 11/26/2020 at 11:38 AM, Hedgehog said:

So, you may be curious as to what is actually happening at eSim right now.


There you are.


The project plan is how Ssnake envisaged  the process. (Not too sure on the "kick off" meeting, that seems like a luxury. )


The reality?

Well, that is what's actually happening right now. This is why a release/update is always delayed.


naah, at esim it's more like this: 

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On 11/26/2020 at 11:35 PM, hoggydog said:

Hmmm, Hedge's attempt at humour seems to have missed the mark by some margin.  


That's you on Santa Ssnakes naughty list Hedge!


Oh Poo.

Here I was thinking that I was being funny.

Ooooh Noes!!!!


Apparently I need to up my game!


On 11/26/2020 at 11:35 PM, hoggydog said:

That's you on Santa Ssnakes naughty list Hedge!


I think I'll manage.


Allow me to supplant my original post:


Personally I think there's been:

A) Like you say, Hoggy, a severe sense of humour failure here.




B) Not enough supplications to the_List.


The rodent sacrificial quota has been abysmal in recent years.

The faithful have wavered.


****ALL HAIL the_List!!!!****


On 11/27/2020 at 1:04 AM, Ssnake said:

Just some clarification, I have no interest to extend this debate longer than absolutely necessary:

OK, Fine, whatever.


It was aimed at Nils rather than the "Team"

Which is where "the Joke" comes in even if it did die on its arse for the intended recipient.


I thinks some Clarification of the graph may be needed

Having previously worked in a software company QA / Test Dept.

I can attest this is a flippant, HUMOROUS (Looking at you, Nils.) but accurate representation:


The Kick off meeting = "Update Time! What's ready? (Feature list presented) This, This & This. Not That. OK, Get on with it."


White stuff in the middle = Other projects (And shit like Customer complaints, Holiday allowances, "Running the Company Stuff" "Trade Shows" "Life") interspersed with the following for whatever is up for release next:


Anaylsis = Uh huh / you want what?! / Are you quite mad?!* / *Insane Giggling from "Somewhere"*


Design = Hmm. / I wonder if.... / *Developer Stare*


Code = It Works** / Yes, it Does!!** / Auuuuuuuuuuuuuugh!!! / *Headdesk* / You can't do that!!******


Test = No, it Doesn't!! ** / That's Weird. / It's fucking fucked!! / Oh.....Oh, Wow. / *Burned out whimpering* / It's okay!****


Release = No CTD Bugs, that we know of. / *Elaborate release ceremony*


Bugfix phase = All the small stuff we forgot/overlooked/were too busy to fix*** / "SQUINT HARDER!!!!" / That CTD bug which was hiding until the time was right. / We found the Giggling. It was Thom.


*True Story.

** Repeat as necessary, NOW can you see why it takes so long to release / test an update? (I imagine Nils must feel like a tennis umpire at times. Pock. Puck. Pock. Puck. 15-Love, Test Dept.)

***Delete as applicable.

****Rarely heard and only in hushed, reverent tones, lest it fuck everything up. Again.

******Again, True Story.




On 11/27/2020 at 1:04 AM, Ssnake said:

How will the team's morale respond if the public face doesn't speak up for them?

Well, knowing one or two of the team, a minor hissy fit would feature fairly high on the possibles list.


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On 11/28/2020 at 4:01 PM, 12Alfa said:

Part 2 ready next


Thanks for posting 12Alfa

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4 hours ago, Marko said:

Thanks for posting 12Alfa

My pleasure, final is coming along well and will be uploaded soon. Exciting times with this update on the SB battlefield....:)

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On 11/27/2020 at 5:31 PM, 12Alfa said:

The new dust effects for choppers are great. Noticed that in one of Grenny's vids, too.

Now I wish eSim would reinstate the dust/obscuration from artillery impacts. It was dropped, I guess, for framerates. Looks odd without it, and I would think there are tactical ramifications for both sides.

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On 11/26/2020 at 8:04 PM, Ssnake said:

Maybe I shouldn't post at 2 AM in a forum after a long work day, and sleep more.


Don't feel bad, I do that too.



...Except replace "a long work day" with "a lot of drinking". 🥴

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